Markov lols

The jokes on this page are machine-generated using a rather simple model known as a Markov chain. For a more detailed description and how to do it yourself, see this Medium post.

An Irishman walks out of a bar. He was brought to the closest hospital quickly

You should never bully fat people.. And you are 3 of them!

What's Paul Walker's favorite tv show? Bones

what did the fish say when he swam into a wall.. thats why im a good person what do you call an asian person that is hit by a car in his left side. hes all right now. what do fat chicks do in the summer? they tan.
had an expired snack pack at lunch today.. it seemed really angry. its not necrophilia if she was alive when the raiders had both eyes. i would post a casey anthony joke.. but i know a cunt when i see one.
whats et short for? because he has huge fans! my viagra addiction.. was the first time i had sex thats because i kept the receipt! why did the shoe go to heaven? hell was full.
i tried giving my cat a bath.. but i just cant be arsed. what do you call a server at a funeral? the corpse. yo momma so unfamiliar with the gym.. but im all right now.
yo mama is so fat that when i swerved around her in my car, i ran out of film a long time ago what did the pirate say when he got to heaven? meh my friend told me a funny joke.. but im not able to blow my own trumpet
hitler wasnt a very athletic man. he never once saw his father. pleased to meet you.... and one was as-salted. help! im 13 and want to get preggo.. but my friend herb is.
your mother is so fat.. you have more bed room but less bedroom why did the cat stop singing? because it was a government job. i like my women how i like my juice from concentrate.
where do suicide bombers go when they die in reddit? everywhere else. if life gives you melons.... i dont like coffee! an irishman walks out of a bar dot he was brought to the closest hospital quickly.
i like my women like i like my farts. wet and old. riding horses is fun and all, but... i think its days are numbered i saw a man drinking brake fluid. but i can pull a hair out of my ass.
i want to learn the finnish language. but i dont know if you have heard this bullshit before. according to the institute of incomplete research, 7 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape. punchline wait, i probably wasnt supposed to put that in the title. how do you piss voldemort off? play got your nose with him
if you can find x.. then why cant you find pirates in kansas? they all live in arkansas what is a feminists favorite operating system? windows. i like my babies like i like my sandwiches.... that it picks cotton.
i once skated on the titanic.. unfortunately i am out of fs. i used to be addicted to the hokey-pokey.. until i got hearing aids. id make jokes about midgets, but that would be offensive to cancer.
blondes are dumb whores.. they all gave it one star. what did the banker use for birth control? their personalities. my furnace broke down on me.. i mean, youve gotta hand it to them.
where do jews buy their clothes? sears. yesterday i had to buy a new ebook reader now i had a pun about insanity.... because mine has a crack in it.
yo mama is so poor.. i can only blame my shelf. i invented a motorized walking stick.. i call them japps. why did 10 die? he was in a great depression.
my stats teacher told me i was a real skeptic.. i didnt nintendo. what do out call an argentinian with a rubber toe? roberto. why did the chicken cross the road? to tell me this joke.. but it has started to grow on me.
what do you call a racist mexican a member of the republican party hes a *whig* why did the dung beetle go to rehab? he had a 2-2. why does a cucumber has a lot of problems.
what did one pencil say to the other banana? youre very appealing i could tell you a rape joke but it would cross the border. what do ducks do in the toilet? a policeman doing his duty!
birds for sale.. all of your bags are czeched why does santa have a large sack? because he only comes once a year. whats the most popular drink at a nude beach. its not hard
will glass coffins be a success? remains to be seen.... aloha akbar. enthusiasm 365 days until christmas and people already have their decorations up. how do you send a jew with adhd a concentration camp.. he fell into the sink
why was the garbage man arrested? because he was a slice of bread why did the chicken cross the road? to say hello from the other side why did the existential nihilist cross the road? to say hello from the other side.
i was gonna tell a sodium joke but na. why did the computer say hello? because its a turd! yo mama so stupid she got hit by a bus? she never saw it coming.
where does light go to jail? for smoking quack! how do fish get stoned.... it was milk chocolate. i realized i was addicted to the hokey pokey.. but i slowly got over it.
oral makes your whole day.. but anal sex makes your hole weak! what is black, white, and red all over? a sunburnt penguin. whats donald trumps favorite operating system? unix.
what does a pig say on a hot day. dripping. you should never bully fat people.. and you are 3 of them ! did you hear that oxygen and magnesium got together? omg!
how many idiots does it take to screw in a light bulb? juan. you know what you call a marine who cant swim? cuatro cincos. an irishman walks past a bar.. ow.
snake walks into a bar. you think the second one wouldve noticed i told my sister a joke about the oscars he didnt get it. my bedtime is 9:11pm.. so i have to shake my fist
why did the cookie smoke weed? because they cant c#. did you hear about the fight in the bathroom? the p is silent where was the first discovered potato located? in the ground. well, well, well.. welcome to india
i have sex daily.. then i turned 12 black jesus. went to jail for sexually abusing a monkey. he was an m pasta i love mange tout.... they really arent my fort-eh.
when a red head goes crazy.. its a site for sore eyes! what do you tell a woman with no boobs? you dont. john cena develops alzheimers.. now hes gone.
how can find a blind guy on a nude beach? it is not hard. i like my beers how i like my coffee.. without a penis what is jigsaws favorite genre of music? jazz duets.
whyd the window get the job? he had a problem with boos. they said when pigs fly.. but he just wasnt my type. did you see that premature ejactulation man he came out of the cabinet.
bought a new boomerang.. but i constantinople. what do you call a mexican who can see into the future? i have 2020 vision why was 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is a registered six offender
dont give karma whores a butter joke.... he didnt believe in dog. my hamster died at the weekend.... never drink and derive what do you call a black man? the third grade.
what did the banana say to the other plate? dinners on me! i love self-depreciating humor.... is the day i go blind. what did the slutty dna say to the rna? uracil-y structure!
shoutout to grandpa.. thats the joke. how did the toad feel in the morning? walks home. why was the mushroom invited to the party? he was a real catch
odo walks down the alley and turns into a field. ba dum tisss an isis member walks into a bar.. the third one ducks. what does c3po stand for? because hes got little legs.
what do you call a mexican woman with no legs? right where you left it. what do you get if you cross a rhetorical question with a joke? why is th earth so mean? because it has little legs.
what do godot and my wife have in common? a cockpit. i challenged brock lesnar to a fight.. but he choked on stage. valentines day is coming but it looks like i dont like apples
lawyers arent all bad.. 98% of lawyers make the other ones look bad. did you guys hear the news? apparently donald trump is a mac user.. hes not a piece of meat. i’ve been acting in porn films but what i really want to tell you all a sex joke butt fuck it.
jenny craig i dropped 40 pounds on jenny craig. i think i dyed a little inside. what is kermit the frogs middle name? the so it is eli the baseke i like my women like i like my coffee like i like my coffee.. without a penis!
what did the number zero say to the eight? nice belt why cant you tell secrets in a corn field? because im stalking you. what do you never call a black man on the moon neil before me
einstein invented a theory about space.. and it was the best trade i ever made. wanna hear a joke about alzheimers? forget it. i got breast removal surgery.. sorry i had to get a colonoscopy today it was a sine from jèsus
my friend was run over by the ice-cream truck. i like my coffee how i like my milk.. rich, white, and 2% fat. why did windows skip to 10? because windows 7 8 9
what do you call a dog with a lot of cents have little sense. the english football team yeah.. thats the only way she can hear me. conjunctivitis. com.... bie doll.
i would shave my beard.. but its also pretty awesome sometimes. where did little suzie go when the bomb exploded? everywhere. unfortunately i lost my korean friend the other day.. the trial is next week
i sweat less when i wear sunglasses.. because i can never get the point. why did the console gamer cross the road? to get to the other bribe i would tell you a gay joke. butt fuck it.
im single for so long my last girlfriend dumped me on a fishing trip. she left me. a blind man walks into a caffe splash how do you make a dog drink? put it in a square cup. now its just beer.
ouch! i stubbed my butt hole.. without a penis what is big and black and full of semen? a submarine. why did the atheist go to church? at the atomic mass!!
want to hear a dirty joke? i want to be pampered! actually, any brand will do. helen keller walked into a bar.. you would shit toast there was a blackout last night.... but not
why did lionel messi cross the road? to get to the chicken how do you keep a black person from niger? a nigerian, you racist what do you call a man with one leg? terry :d
went to a kkk meeting the other day.. i found 95¢ in the urinal. my neighbors listen to awesome music. wether they like it or not. what do vegetables say when they go to war? you giraffed it
what did the math teacher wear to the ball? she gagged. dont have phone sex.... it stole my bike. i have a genetic diarrhea disease.. the shit runs in my family.. they stumble around breaking things
an irishman walks out of a bar.. then a table, then a chair why cant you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom? shit went down that sinking feeling.. when youre not dead
whats vatican citys national animal? the drug mule. once youve seen one shopping center.... a religion of peace piece of you here, piece of you there life is like a box of chocolates they will kill your dog.
where does sean connery sit? in the toilet.. he was fucking nuts what do you call a zoo with only one animal, a dog.. it was first come first serve. when is the best time on a clock.... is the best day of my life but then i woke up.
nsfw how much sperm does a gay guy fake an orgasm? he spits on his boyfriends back why did the black man have a heart attack is during a game of charades. my dad told me that getting a blowjob is the only way to date a vegetarian? become a vegetable
how many christian women does it take to kill an irishman? none. not all muslims are terrorists.. but most terrorists are muslims? because most of them ahmad. i tried to catch fog today.. i blame my shelf.
what did one wall say to the cop? dont glaze me, bro your mum.... a table, and a human. haegel, nietzsche and aristotle walk into a bar.. and orders a beer.. and a chair, and a table. and a chair.
i just saved a girl from getting raped today.. i put it in her: i wondered why the train was getting bigger. then it struck me. an irishman walks out of a bar.. they never grow old
i dont like peanut butter.. it just wont stop channel hopping. i just took a huge shit. i dont know the rest, so fuck it. what happens on the first date.
two mexicans are in a car.. would it have windows? this girl told me she didnt poop.. but i couldnt keep up. how many portuguese people can fit on a spaceship.
why was 9 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9 can a toyota stretch? no, but a tiger wood. how many dead babys does it take to kill an irishman? zero.
a police officer walks into a bar.... then we met. did you hear about the 3 holes in the ground say? well, well, well. i could tell you a rape joke but it would cross the border.
i dated this muslim girl once.. until my binoculars broke i like my men like i like my women.. silent how did the king die? he had an an*yarr*ysm.
i said hi to ellen pao today she told me to czech my privilege. if wishes were fishes.... ba dum psshhh! i found out today its ok to date a nun.. you just have to put your mind into it.
my best friends a rocking chair.... hes a stupid motherfucker. why is jay cutler gay? because of all of the coffin. bill cosby is like santa claus hes old, fat, and comes once in a year. she left me.
you shouldnt personify inanimate objects. they hate it when you punch up the fuckline how do you tell a joke on reddit i was gonna make a joke about an infinite line no point.
i was going to tell a mexican joke.. but you didnt like it.. what did the buffalo say to his son? look, i am your fuhrer what street do you put a jew with adhd a concentration camp.. he fell off his gaurd post.
why did the ghost go to the party? cos he was a fun-guy yo mama so fat.. she was a firm believer. what does harry potter say when he wants another taco? another, juan
what do you call a blowjob from a girl once.. but i dont want to be spotted. i like my women how i like my wine cold and in a box. a dead baby in 10 boxes. i got invited to a potluck orgy.. it was a shih tzu.
what does salvador dali have for breakfast? aids and bacon. what do you call a guy with a small penis? cockasian i was going to make an anal joke here.... has members all around the globe
what happens if you steel? you have to start it. why did adele cross the road to read the repost on the other side then? adele i went on a date with a vacuum salesperson last night.. his name was pedro.
two peanuts were walking down a road.. and turns into a pub what did one egg say to the other telepath? nothing. a man overdosed on viagra it was the hardest part of the vegetable is hardest to eat? the wheelchair
how did the russian babysitter win the race? he didnt reich the finish line. i want to tell a kidney joke.. but you didnt like it. i was going to tell an addition joke.... you might be dyslexic. i play triangle in a reggae band? jamaica mon!
my islamic wife left me.. i think im on my heariod 39 and 41 had a fight. 21. so stephen hawking walked into a bar hes gay now
what do deer and women have in common they both like to eat pussy whats red and bad for your teeth?.. a pig up truck what did the clock do after night left him? he was in the middle of 9/11.
what do you call a cheap circumcision?.. a blew fish. what do nazis eat for breakfast? surreal. i tried tap dancing once.... you probably have dyslexia.
harambe is probably.... drunk. where do you find a dog with no legs? a yardstick. why are there trees in harlem? public transportation.
why didnt the neuron cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken. knock knock knock!! whos there? the pilot, let me in!!!! what do dolphins like to listen to? a trail mix!
what did the spice say when it was in trouble? kelp me! what do you say to a man with no legs walks into a bar -- and sustains a mild concussion. ive got an inferiority complex.. its not uranus.
fall asleep on a jigsaw. woke up with a ringing in my left ear so i put my root beer in a square glass? beer why is 6 scared of 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender my dad died on 9/11.. he was looking for pooh.
a jewish man walks into a bar.. and it didnt how do you make a tissue dance? you put mustard on the beat what is serena williams favorite time of day? tooth-hurty
what is the most popular bar in the middle east speak? scarabic im applying for a position as a mall cop.. it has its prose and cons. a handicapped guy walks into a bar.. and disses lexy.. he has alternative fucks.
i heard oscar pistorius might walk at the end of a mans genitals? his hand. yo mama so ugly she stuck her head out the window and fell up. where did little johnny go when the bombs went off? everywhere.
how long does it take to make an octopus laugh? ten tickles. drinking is like carpentry.. you get it? a man walks into a bar then they bleed to death
how do you keep someone curious? ill tell you a joke about my dick but its so short its already over i like my men like i like my scotch like i like my women black and tastes like warm diarrhea. whats a black mans favorite type of music? heavy metal!
yo momma is so dumb she had to call sherwin-williams to paint her toenails! i like my women like i like my fish the same way i like my women how i like my coffee.. lukewarm and bitter. opinions are like mixtapes.. i dont even speak chinese!
why dont witches wear underpants? to get a 6pac! -7th grade me you need jesus in your life. push and pull why did the hen cross the road? inertia.
only 1940 kids will get this deez nuts what does a chinese gay man have for dinner? fish and ships. why was the pianist arrested? he was doing crystal math.
what does all gods have in common? very little. stop making fun of fat people with lisps.. are thick and tired of it. two hemophiliacs walk into a bar.. she was fined for littering
my girlfriend called me a pedophile thats a big word for a 9 year old african boy crying on his knees midlife crisis a fish swam into a wall? dam! why do bicycles fall over? because it was set so low.
whats the best thing about having sex with 22 year olds there are twenty of them what do you call an asian person that is hit by a car before, you dont want to see naked? knock knock knock knock, whos there? not trayvon martin -- that nigga dead!
molestation isnt funny! seriously its a touchy subject for me. winona ryder is awesome in stranger things. she stole the show why did the stop sign get an std? because he was fired
two bass drums and a cymbal jump off a cliff boom, boom people say andy dick is an asshole.. hes a jerk.. what did one druid say to the other window? im in pane
i like my women like i like my women like i like my women like i like my women how i like my ladies strong, black, and preferably fair trade finally my winter fat is gone.. now i look hard. my waifu is the square root of 69? 8 something
what did jay z say when his friend ran out of tp? bidet mate! what do you call a censored dmx song? a really good time ruined by a period where did the sick boat go to get a haircut? no son, i got all of them cut.
just juan how many mexicans does it take to kill an irishman? zero. i mostly make black jokes because i have a short joke my penis. so two snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff.... posting to the wrong subreddit.
yo mama is so stupid she threw a clock out the window to see a butterfly. while ajax sales have been going down.. its still needs work. just bought a copy of the bible for dummies turned out it was just carpal tunnel.
what has only one arm and cant swim? a microwave oven. frieza may be cool.. but his check bounces. what drove the british mystery fan insane? he lost his patients..
what did the police say to the hot atheist girl? shake that blasphemy what do you call a zoo that only has one dog. its a shih tzu. i bought a broken marionette the other day no one saw him coming.
what did hitler tell his wife on valentines day? to the moooovies why did the chicken cross the road? i wore the wrong socks today for all of us singles out there.. you da reel mvp
a man threw milk at an old woman before.. i said id have to sleep on it. why didnt the skeleton cross the road? in a kfc bucket. my sister said im being immature. i told her to get out of bed? 13:37
how do you keep a black person from niger? a nigerian, you racist a mans home is his castle!.. in a game of chess? shrekmate. a gymnast walks into a bar.. and he used your face as a rough draft..
why couldnt spock flush the toilet? because it was dead. chemist who falls in acid.... its technically sound. two dyslexics.. walk into a bar youd think one of them would have seen it.
why should you never give elsa a balloon? because shell let it go what do you call a guy who hangs out with musicians called? a singer at first i didnt like my new haircut.. but now im just an air conditioner.
why are gas giants always so happy? because of twos compliment! why didnt the dog wanna play football? it was a real close-knit community. i used to be a nun.. you just have to add 24 carrots
if a dog is on a submarine.. is it called a beef? an irish man walks out of a bar.. and a chair. why does nasa throw the best parties.. they make up everything.
why did bill gates get sick? because he left his son. so the irish are pissed.... you may get repossessed. lol i wanted to be funny, well, then i remembered i was in an asian restaurant.
whats small, gray, and came in little cans? red bull and priests. why is th earth so mean? because he was a sauerkraut. i was the second person on the moon? an astronaut. racist jerk
two men walk into a bar so.. a dyslexic man walks into a bar.. and doesnt. with age comes wisdom.... is like leonardo dicaprios oscar. i know where to get a lot of sheet.
your moms so old that she was alive when i started. what is easy to get into, but hard to get out of school tell the school you are sikh i hate it when winter comes. it makes my day. makes my night too.
tell your mother to stop wearing lipstick. my dick is like an american too fat, but dangerous. why did hitler really commit suicide? he saw the gas bill. bought a new boomerang how do i get rid of the female hero just the e
what did the rock say to the other ocean? nothing, it just waved. fact every 60 seconds in africa.. dry humor. let me tell you the joke about the 3 wells? well well well
what is the dumbest animal in the jungle the polar bear. i would tell you a pizza joke.. never mind its too long. if life gives you melons.... his name was pedro.
i used to be a man inside a womans body then my mother gave birth. what do you call a black man? tequila mockingbird what do you call a bear in the rain? its too wet to woo.
what came in the mail today.... but it makes my mother board what do ducks do in the toilet? it was a polar bear why was 6 afraid of 9? because 10 9 8
why did the stick bug go to the hospital? it wasnt peeling well. what is the difference between a soap and a jew? a sneeze. america needs to build a statue of the man who banged an atm? he came into a lot of money
why did the atheist chicken cross the road? to suck my fuckin dick! i was paper-thin as a kid.. recycling is important, after all. why dont prawns give to charity? because they are used to eating nuts
im like a fat ladys flip-flop.... i would have a punchline here. why didnt edward leave russia? cause he was fullllly sik m8. i would shave my beard.. but its only chinatown.
whats paul walkers favorite tv show? bones. what do birds order when they go to war? you giraffed it why are cars in russia so slow? because they are in sects.
how do you pick up a gay man in his house by himself? homolone only pre-2017 kids will get this deez nuts i put the sexy.... you will be mist
i used to be conceited,.. but now i cant seem to make up one you might be a redneck if there is a draft: put a coat on. there are two kinds of people in this world. and i hate myself for it.
how many potatoes does it take to park a car? a camel auto! what do you call a black man on the moon cut his hair? eclipse it. i used to miss mitch hedburg i still do. but i used to, too. rip
id make jokes about midgets, but that would be offensive to cancer. how do you call a man with no honey do? he cantaloupe. where do pedophiles get the wedding rings? they go to yarrgggghhh sales.
so.. a dyslexic man walks into a bar.. ouch!!!! why did john f. kennedy die? he was caught red handed. how do you find blind man on a nude beach? its not hard.
the sun told me he was traumiticed i thought making cheese was hard. but it was just a fanta sea! why is a river so rich? because jesus saves.
susie has no arms knock knock! whos there? to. to who? to whom! only 1700s sailors will get this.. social security benefits -50s kids american fat man falls.... because i lost my car.
my boss told me to have a good time? the turkey club a nazi and jew walk into a bar they can be gay. i was going to be about cheese.. but none of them work.
what did one pencil say to the other? see you next month! what kind of shoes do the richest people in the world those who understand binary and those who dont just lasted over an hour in bed.. its a site for sore eyes.
im addicted to nun porn.. its not the heat, its the stupidity. what does a blueberry do at a party? hell tell you. what did the elevator say to the stairs? never mind, ill just come up with a one liner. shit.
why doesnt ed have a girlfriend? because it always comes to fast i decided to give away all of my dead batteries free of charge only 1700s sailors will get this.. 80 doesnt have a kid.
so i was talking to this dolphin the other day.. it was a salt. my dad had the heart of a lion.. youve seen a mall i was so close to a threesome last night.. just needed two more people. 
what did the car say to the other plumber? pipe down. i hate russian dolls.. theyre so picky. never trust a parasol.. i hear theyre all the rage!
whats a man in a hurry like to drink? pina colliders. what does a catholic eat at the movies? it took a tumbl! im not fucking stupid. i mean, i did steal her wheelchair
i told a joke about noble gasses the other day.. it was lit xm radio suddenly went to the hospital.. 22 i always wanted to try juggling.. i just didnt know her first name was always.
im not saying jews are cheap.. but a third man ducks. whats gordon ramsays favorite sex position? missionary. what kind of bagel can fly? a magpie.
so a man robs an underwear store.. it was pretty gouda. what do you call a mexican with no legs? nothing, hell shoot you. worlds worst sitcom about a bisexual and a virgin two and a half men has aids.
what is a stalkers favorite part of a book is always chapter 11 what currency do they use in star wars? a space bar. i like my coffee like i like my slaves like i like my women without a penis.
a golfer stabbed a mexican the other day.. didnt taste like it at all!! frank has no arms. **knock knock whos there? me me who? mew my humour is so black.... that she literally ate my dick.
19 and 20 had a fight. 31. war does not determine who is right.. 2 more times a day than i am why did the xbox owner cross the road? to say hello from the other side!
whats an alcoholics favorite book? tequila mockingbird. what would you call hitler if he was a vegetable? baroccoli wanna hear a joke about a clock.... but sometimes its hard though
without nipples.... but then i changed my mind. i wanted to make a joke about anal.... with a dust pan and broom. whos the best jewish cook in the world? a buzzillion.
why is microsoft skipping windows 9? because 7 8 9 i got a michael jackson mug.. it goes back four seconds. a man walks into a bar a guy walks into a bar.. it could work on cottonfarms
i thought making cheese was hard. but it was sold out. what kind of bees produce milk?.. the execution why did the muslim cross the road? to suck my fucking cock.
i went to the zoo today and all they had was a dog it was a shih tzu what did the pope say to the hot water? why can a cheetah not hide? because its always in bed.
why did the stick bug go to the hospital? it wasnt peeling well. why did the semen cross the road? to say hello from the other side. why did yoda cross the road? to show a deer how its done. i forgot to bring my towel to the gym.. she call it the james
so, a byslexic guy walks into a bar.. and orders alcohol. and then he leaves. what did the penis say to the other? im not ovary fond of you your vaginas ph is so messed up.. that you have to put a hand on a hoe.
whats better than roses on the piano? a minor. what kind of car does god drive? a christler im so sorry.. a man with dyslexia.. walks into a bra... yeah.
how do u stop a black person from drowning? you dont when i die, throw berries on my grave cause thats how i would like to order a sandwich.. oh wait never mind! i almost had a threesome last night.. not all dogs want cuddles.
i was gonna tell you a pizza joke.... you motherfucker if trump replaces obama as president, orange will be the new black skincolor of the president. officer why did you shoot me? i dont know and neither does she
obama, the cia, and darpa walk into a bar one was a salted. what do you call a deer with no eyes? a fsh. my pony back from the doctors.. hes still in denial.
your momma is so old that when she farts, she destroys the ozone layer above her! alcoholics dont run in my family.. but nobody runs in my family. it just kinda lazes about. whats the worst type of sand to have in your pants? uncles in your pants
whats the hardest thing about being a pedophile? fitting in. carpe natem translate it if you dont know its gender? mitsuheshe. how did the depressed man get around town? on penny boards.
hey girl, are you made of lead? flintstones. one day ill make a cure for blindness. youll see! youll all see! how do bees go to the bathroom? depends.
you know reddit, yall like school in the summer.. no class im so superstitious i never want to see the bot try to explain this. you look so young.. what is my focal point?
breitbart news is a lot like food.... theyre just plane wrong i love the way the earth rotates. it really makes my day? the rotation of the earth really makes my day. i thought reverse psychology was when.. you need it to skydive twice.
a man found a magic lamp.. and he used your face as a rough draft. why dont skeletons get sick? because they have lots of pounds. the past, present and future walked into a bar. sorry, a war.
what do you call two black guys on a stage? an auction where does max planck go for a night out? paints the town red i invented a motorized walking stick.. i call them japps.
what do you call it when an eskimo makes a dirty joke? a white horse fell in the mud i like my women like i like my steak like i like my coffee i dont like coffee american.... it was really time consuming
i used to be a man inside a womans body. then my mother gave birth how did the astrologer cross the road? find out next time on dragonball z! want to know why? or do you want to hear a joke about a rapper i ended up making a big pun
you dont know.... so i moved. what does a belt like to do? jack off. whats snoop doggs favorite time of day? ten-ish.
yo girl, you must be a butterfly cuz i feel like i can sleep through to next year what do you call an internet cafe in russia? a sweeper agent. anti-jokes: here are three of my favorite things.
snoring comes easily to me. in fact, i can do it with my eyes closed. why did the train kill people? it had a sandy bottom. why didnt the chicken cross the road? he was snowed in.
i spilled spot eraser on my dog. now i cant see $#!7 3 guys walk into a bar no one survived the explosion. why did the dead baby cross the road? because it was a fowl.
why did the funeral director cover his mouth? he ate pizza before it was cool so the creator of pac man died today.. unfortunately, it was decapitated. someone told me it was as easy as 1, 2, 8
how do you get a fat girl in yoga pants at walmart? cashier